Have you
ever experienced something so impactful that a core part of your identity was
formed, one you had no idea you had? That’s something that happens to many
LGBT+ individuals in college as they get out on their own. The sudden
independence and exposure to individuals they may have never encountered
otherwise can open the door to discovering themselves.
“I came out last year,”
said Cyrus Jackson, a transgender man in his junior year. “I hadn’t really had
a chance to think too much about my gender at home.” Once he’d gotten involved
with other LGBT+ people on campus, the door to questioning things was opened.
“One of my friends came out as nonbinary and when they did that, I started
thinking about my gender more in-depth.”
Cyrus realized he’d never
questioned anything because he’d always been the ‘beloved granddaughter’ and
‘perfect daughter.’ He’d simply accepted that role, and even though he never
liked wearing dresses and never liked how his body looked, he assumed it was a
regular part of puberty. In his prom photo, he’s the epitome of discomfort; his
shoulders hunched forward and a forced smile, seeming to hope that he could go
invisible.
Cyrus pre-transition, getting his prom dress altered.
“Before I’d fully admitted
to myself or anyone else that I was a man, one of the ladies who worked in the
cafeteria called me ‘sir,’” Cyrus said. “I absolutely lit up, excited that
someone had seen me as something other than a girl. I was gushing about it to
my friends and then started experimenting with he/him pronouns.” Two months
later, Cyrus knew there was no other explanation and came out as transgender.
He started hormone therapy
over that summer, seeing some drastic changes to his voice and build after just
a few months. He still takes testosterone to this day and continually changes
for the better. “Ever since he started taking HRT, he’s brightened up beyond
belief,” said Vix Gerry, Cyrus’s friend. “He stands up straighter, he talks
more, and he can actually make eye contact.” The confidence level change is
noticeable; he’s started engaging in more activities and making friends in
classes instead of trying to blend in with the back wall.
“I wouldn’t have been able
to do this without my college friends,” Cyrus said. “Having them around and
supporting me made it possible for me to explore my gender and figure myself
out.”
College is a time of
self-discovery for everyone, but more so for LGBT+ individuals. They can take
the time to themselves and think about their gender and sexuality. Giving
people the time and space to discover themselves is incredibly important, and
college is just the way to do it for some people. If you have friends or family
who came out during college (or any other time), give them your support.
Chances are, you’ll see your loved ones change for the better.
Cyrus a few years after starting HRT.